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SPAM!


Blue Charvel

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  • 2 weeks later...
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I.AM MR MOSES ADAM , THE FOREIGN REMITTANCE MANAGER OF(BOA) BANK AFRICA IN BURKINA FASO.INDICATE YOUR INTRESTT TORECEIVE THE TRANSFER OF US$25 MILLION.US DOLLAS. 50% FOR ME AND 40%FOR YOU,10% FOR ANY INCURABLE EXPENSES THAT WILL COME DURING THE TRANSFER, YOU WILL STAND AS NEXT OF KING TO MY LATECUSTOMER MR.JOHN KOROVO WHO DIED ON PLANE CRASH ON (Kenya Plane Crash 2003.)LIVING NO BODY BEHIND .

You can view this site to know more.

http://www.cnn.com/2003/WORLD/africa/07/20...rash/index.html

CONTACT ME FOR MONRE DETAILS ABOUT THE DECEASED

(CUSTOMER, AND YOU SEND ALL BELOW INFORMATOIN TO ME.

 

YOUR NAME..

PHON....

NUMBER..YOUR AGE......

OCCUPATOIN....

COUNTRY.......

THANKS FROM MR. MOSES ADAM +226 78666175‏

 

That is some of the finest spelling I have EVER seen, it must be legit.

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I actually have received this Moses Adams email about a day ago. Now I am the KING of Burkina Faso, after responding. :screwy:

Yeah, but did you get all the "dollas"? And watch for those "incurable expenses", they itch like crazy!

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Sadly, I have incurable expenses, according to my doctor. And if I give him some of my newly acquired dollas, he can sort me. Other than that, he says I have three moths to live or I will decrease without trickortreatment.

 

All this because of Moses Adams. What a dead wanker he turned out to be.

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Sadly, I have incurable expenses, according to my doctor. And if I give him some of my newly acquired dollas, he can sort me. Other than that, he says I have three moths to live or I will decrease without trickortreatment.

 

All this because of Moses Adams. What a dead wanker he turned out to be.

:( Wow, I guess he wasn't really acting in your best "intrestts"... ;)

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  • 7 months later...

Your internet access is going to get suspended

 

The Internet Service Provider Consorcium was made to protect the rights of software authors, artists.

We conduct regular wiretapping on our networks, to monitor criminal acts.

 

We are aware of your illegal activities on the internet wich were originating from

 

You can check the report of your activities in the past 6 month that we have attached. We strongly advise you to stop your activities regarding the illegal downloading of copyrighted material of your internet access will be suspended.

 

Sincerely

ICS Monitoring Team

 

Wow this looks serious, especially since it was sent to my Brutal Metal address from... my Brutal Metal address... guess I better click open this attached "report.zip" file and see what's going on ASAP!!!!

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Your internet access is going to get suspended

 

The Internet Service Provider Consorcium was made to protect the rights of software authors, artists.

We conduct regular wiretapping on our networks, to monitor criminal acts.

 

We are aware of your illegal activities on the internet wich were originating from

 

You can check the report of your activities in the past 6 month that we have attached. We strongly advise you to stop your activities regarding the illegal downloading of copyrighted material of your internet access will be suspended.

 

Sincerely

ICS Monitoring Team

 

Wow this looks serious, especially since it was sent to my Brutal Metal address from... my Brutal Metal address... guess I better click open this attached "report.zip" file and see what's going on ASAP!!!!

 

:rofl: Careful, man. Those "Consorciums" are tough bastards.

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Your internet access is going to get suspended

 

The Internet Service Provider Consorcium was made to protect the rights of software authors, artists.

We conduct regular wiretapping on our networks, to monitor criminal acts.

 

We are aware of your illegal activities on the internet wich were originating from

 

You can check the report of your activities in the past 6 month that we have attached. We strongly advise you to stop your activities regarding the illegal downloading of copyrighted material of your internet access will be suspended.

 

Sincerely

ICS Monitoring Team

 

Wow this looks serious, especially since it was sent to my Brutal Metal address from... my Brutal Metal address... guess I better click open this attached "report.zip" file and see what's going on ASAP!!!!

 

:rofl: Careful, man. Those "Consorciums" are tough bastards.

Worst part is, you know someone out there fell for it.... :bananamac:

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I got this one today... thought it was rather, shall we say, "odd." :blink:

 

ERRAND PERSON NEEDED.

...

Wed, February 10, 2010 10:17:39 AM

From:

Tom Morgan <tom@office.com>

...

 

To:

1)Can you take care of my personal and business errands at his/her spare time. collect my mails and drop them off,pay my bills on my behalf pick items up at nearby post office at your convenience. Individual will be needed 2/Half hrs. Per-week . Let me know if you will be able to offer me any/all of these services. Compensation for the job is $350 .Let me know if you will be able to offer me any/all of these services.

Thanks. Tom

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I got this one today... thought it was rather, shall we say, "odd." :blink:

 

ERRAND PERSON NEEDED.

...

Wed, February 10, 2010 10:17:39 AM

From:

Tom Morgan <tom@office.com>

...

 

To:

1)Can you take care of my personal and business errands at his/her spare time. collect my mails and drop them off,pay my bills on my behalf pick items up at nearby post office at your convenience. Individual will be needed 2/Half hrs. Per-week . Let me know if you will be able to offer me any/all of these services. Compensation for the job is $350 .Let me know if you will be able to offer me any/all of these services.

Thanks. Tom

Right up your alley sir!! :tumbsup:

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Right up your alley sir!! :tumbsup:

 

 

Seriously! $350 for "two half hours per week?" I hate to think what might be in this guy's mail that he wants me to pick up for him... drugs? Kiddie porn? Poisonous spiders? Nuclear weapons? :blink:

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Got this one today:

 

Aloha

 

My dear future beloved, our meeting will be as if sparkles of lights dancing between us and we will not stop and will not contain ourselves by just looking at one another. Our heartbeats will beat as one since our hearts will be united by a union that only eternity can sustained. Every detail and movement in our body counts, every breath will be significant since we will meet, since we will breathe as one. Our eyes will meet and speak a language of silence that only the two of us will be able to decipher. And since that day our lives will take their twist.

I will be waiting for the time will meet and leave no space for the time we have been apart. Find me here livesoulmate.net/withhope/

 

Sincerely yourth

Veroni

 

..."sincerely yourth?" Does this chick have a lithp? :unsure:

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Got this one today:

 

Aloha

 

My dear future beloved, our meeting will be as if sparkles of lights dancing between us and we will not stop and will not contain ourselves by just looking at one another. Our heartbeats will beat as one since our hearts will be united by a union that only eternity can sustained. Every detail and movement in our body counts, every breath will be significant since we will meet, since we will breathe as one. Our eyes will meet and speak a language of silence that only the two of us will be able to decipher. And since that day our lives will take their twist.

I will be waiting for the time will meet and leave no space for the time we have been apart. Find me here livesoulmate.net/withhope/

 

Sincerely yourth

Veroni

 

..."sincerely yourth?" Does this chick have a lithp? :unsure:

:rofl2: The wording makes me :puke:

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  • 1 month later...

Some of these phishers/spammers are not even TRYING anymore. Look at this short but sweet little message:

 

From:

"ve3bjrs@xcelco.on.ca" <ve3bjrs@xcelco.on.ca>

 

You have won 550,000GBP, Name,age,Country

 

Come on, man, that's the best they can do? They expect someone to fall for that? It needs some PIZAZZ, a little song, a little DANCE!!!

 

Boris Hendricks <h2u2i6hs@ms21.hinet.net>

 

Hi!

You have asked my opinion about Elite World Casino. As for me, it is one of the best online casinos.

Im not ever going to change it for anything else. If youre just an amateur in online gambling, sign up for it.

They have always ready to help staff, excellent software and a variety of games.

Albert

 

http://somef*ckinglamevirusladensite

 

Um...Hi, Boris, whoever you are... I never asked you for your opinion about Elite World Casino. You think I'm clickin' that link, you are out of your mind. Denied. Buh-bye.

 

Hi, John,

How are you? Have you already signed up for the online casino I had advised you? I highly recommend it! I'm writing you to invite for the celebration of the jackpot that I won on Friday. Come with Ann, I hope she'll change her mind about gambling. I'll call you later to agree the time.

Regards,

Ronald

 

 

http://anotherf*ckinglamevirusladensite

 

Hiya Ronald!! Another casino huh? Wow, what are the odds? By the way, my name's not "John" and I don't know anybody named "Ann." Somehow I doubt you'll be calling later to "agree to the time." But hey, thanks for the message!! I appreciate being invited for the celebration of the jackpot that you won on Friday!

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Some of these phishers/spammers are not even TRYING anymore. Look at this short but sweet little message:

 

From:

"ve3bjrs@xcelco.on.ca" <ve3bjrs@xcelco.on.ca>

 

You have won 550,000GBP, Name,age,Country

 

Come on, man, that's the best they can do? They expect someone to fall for that? It needs some PIZAZZ, a little song, a little DANCE!!!

 

Boris Hendricks <h2u2i6hs@ms21.hinet.net>

 

Hi!

You have asked my opinion about Elite World Casino. As for me, it is one of the best online casinos.

Im not ever going to change it for anything else. If youre just an amateur in online gambling, sign up for it.

They have always ready to help staff, excellent software and a variety of games.

Albert

 

http://somef*ckinglamevirusladensite

 

Um...Hi, Boris, whoever you are... I never asked you for your opinion about Elite World Casino. You think I'm clickin' that link, you are out of your mind. Denied. Buh-bye.

 

Hi, John,

How are you? Have you already signed up for the online casino I had advised you? I highly recommend it! I'm writing you to invite for the celebration of the jackpot that I won on Friday. Come with Ann, I hope she'll change her mind about gambling. I'll call you later to agree the time.

Regards,

Ronald

 

 

http://anotherf*ckinglamevirusladensite

 

Hiya Ronald!! Another casino huh? Wow, what are the odds? By the way, my name's not "John" and I don't know anybody named "Ann." Somehow I doubt you'll be calling later to "agree to the time." But hey, thanks for the message!! I appreciate being invited for the celebration of the jackpot that you won on Friday!

 

 

Hey look close at those links. See the word VIRUS in there?? Just letting ya know..... :tumbsup:

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Hey look close at those links. See the word VIRUS in there?? Just letting ya know..... :tumbsup:

 

I made up those Web addresses. I didn't want to post the "real" links for fear of someone accidentally clicking on them...

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Hiya Ronald!! Another casino huh? Wow, what are the odds? By the way, my name's not "John" and I don't know anybody named "Ann." Somehow I doubt you'll be calling later to "agree to the time." But hey, thanks for the message!! I appreciate being invited for the celebration of the jackpot that you won on Friday!

 

:rofl2:

 

Nice 'reply'. Some of these are priceless, I just can't believe how many c***s are out there trying to scam us!

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Hiya Ronald!! Another casino huh? Wow, what are the odds? By the way, my name's not "John" and I don't know anybody named "Ann." Somehow I doubt you'll be calling later to "agree to the time." But hey, thanks for the message!! I appreciate being invited for the celebration of the jackpot that you won on Friday!

 

:rofl2:

 

Nice 'reply'. Some of these are priceless, I just can't believe how many c***s are out there trying to scam us!

 

 

Somewhere around here (perhaps earlier in this thread), Geoff posted that he replied to one of these SPAMS by saying "Hey (name of spammer): Fuck You," and the guy actually responded "Dear Geoff: Fuck you too." I have been tempted several times since then to do the same with one of these e-mails but haven't done so yet. :rofl2:

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Somewhere around here (perhaps earlier in this thread), Geoff posted that he replied to one of these SPAMS by saying "Hey (name of spammer): Fuck You," and the guy actually responded "Dear Geoff: Fuck you too." I have been tempted several times since then to do the same with one of these e-mails but haven't done so yet. :rofl2:

 

Speaking of which: http://www.somethingawful.com/d/email-pranks/email-spam-something.php

A bit wordy, but it's pretty funny.

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Somewhere around here (perhaps earlier in this thread), Geoff posted that he replied to one of these SPAMS by saying "Hey (name of spammer): Fuck You," and the guy actually responded "Dear Geoff: Fuck you too." I have been tempted several times since then to do the same with one of these e-mails but haven't done so yet. :rofl2:

 

Speaking of which: http://www.somethingawful.com/d/email-pranks/email-spam-something.php

A bit wordy, but it's pretty funny.

 

Class! :rofl:

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  • 2 months later...

Somewhere around here (perhaps earlier in this thread), Geoff posted that he replied to one of these SPAMS by saying "Hey (name of spammer): Fuck You," and the guy actually responded "Dear Geoff: Fuck you too." I have been tempted several times since then to do the same with one of these e-mails but haven't done so yet. :rofl2:

 

Geoff inspired me. Last night I got a Spam from someone claiming (in hilariously broken English) to be a "single woman" who "saw my profile on the web site" (?) and wanted to get to know me. I couldn't help myself, I responded and said "Hi whatever your name is, please sodomize yourself with a tire iron." :rofl:

 

The kicker is ... this morning, I had another message from the same person (subject line: I REVEAL THIS BECAUSE I LOVE YOU), telling me how "gratified" she was by my reply (obviously they didn't read it... heh heh!) and then went on and on about how her late father was a banker in Burkina Faso who left her a stash of money, and she needed my help to get her and the $$ out of the country... y'know, the usual drill. So I responded again, "What, again? Obviously you can't read English. Are you f**king stupid? Leave me the f**k alone." :lol:

 

We'll see what the next reply (if any) brings. :rofl2:

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Somewhere around here (perhaps earlier in this thread), Geoff posted that he replied to one of these SPAMS by saying "Hey (name of spammer): Fuck You," and the guy actually responded "Dear Geoff: Fuck you too." I have been tempted several times since then to do the same with one of these e-mails but haven't done so yet. :rofl2:

 

Geoff inspired me. Last night I got a Spam from someone claiming (in hilariously broken English) to be a "single woman" who "saw my profile on the web site" (?) and wanted to get to know me. I couldn't help myself, I responded and said "Hi whatever your name is, please sodomize yourself with a tire iron." :rofl:

 

The kicker is ... this morning, I had another message from the same person (subject line: I REVEAL THIS BECAUSE I LOVE YOU), telling me how "gratified" she was by my reply (obviously they didn't read it... heh heh!) and then went on and on about how her late father was a banker in Burkina Faso who left her a stash of money, and she needed my help to get her and the $$ out of the country... y'know, the usual drill. So I responded again, "What, again? Obviously you can't read English. Are you f**king stupid? Leave me the f**k alone." :lol:

 

We'll see what the next reply (if any) brings. :rofl2:

 

 

Your ''please sodomize yourself with a tire iron'' comment is the offer of marriage in some countries mate. Let us know how the big day goes :D

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Somewhere around here (perhaps earlier in this thread), Geoff posted that he replied to one of these SPAMS by saying "Hey (name of spammer): Fuck You," and the guy actually responded "Dear Geoff: Fuck you too." I have been tempted several times since then to do the same with one of these e-mails but haven't done so yet. :rofl2:

 

Geoff inspired me. Last night I got a Spam from someone claiming (in hilariously broken English) to be a "single woman" who "saw my profile on the web site" (?) and wanted to get to know me. I couldn't help myself, I responded and said "Hi whatever your name is, please sodomize yourself with a tire iron." :rofl:

 

The kicker is ... this morning, I had another message from the same person (subject line: I REVEAL THIS BECAUSE I LOVE YOU), telling me how "gratified" she was by my reply (obviously they didn't read it... heh heh!) and then went on and on about how her late father was a banker in Burkina Faso who left her a stash of money, and she needed my help to get her and the $$ out of the country... y'know, the usual drill. So I responded again, "What, again? Obviously you can't read English. Are you f**king stupid? Leave me the f**k alone." :lol:

 

We'll see what the next reply (if any) brings. :rofl2:

 

 

Your ''please sodomize yourself with a tire iron'' comment is the offer of marriage in some countries mate. Let us know how the big day goes :D

 

:drink: Please invite all of us to the big day!

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