Death of a Pet

[LV KIX]

Just wondering if any of you here with young kids have had to put a pet to sleep? I explained to my son that while he is in school tomorrow I as going to have to put our cat to sleep. I'm not sure if I handled it correctly or not. I though it only fair to let him know...so he could say his final farewell to to her. Although now I'm not sure that was a good idea. It's almost 10:30 PM here and about 10 minutes ago he cried himself to sleep. At 7 years old he hasn't had to deal with death in any for yet. He did tell me he wanted to help me dig the cat's grave after he got home from school.

 

How has any of you dealt with a situation like this?

 

I've had this cat for about 17 years... I'm OK with my decision right now, but I know when tomorrow gets here it isn't gonna be easy for me either. Strange to think a cat can become such an important part of someone's life.

[BrianJ8173]

Just wondering if any of you here with young kids have had to put a pet to sleep? I explained to my son that while he is in school tomorrow I as going to have to put our cat to sleep. I'm not sure if I handled it correctly or not. I though it only fair to let him know...so he could say his final farewell to to her. Although now I'm not sure that was a good idea. It's almost 10:30 PM here and about 10 minutes ago he cried himself to sleep. At 7 years old he hasn't had to deal with death in any for yet. He did tell me he wanted to help me dig the cat's grave after he got home from school.

 

How has any of you dealt with a situation like this?

 

I've had this cat for about 17 years... I'm OK with my decision right now, but I know when tomorrow gets here it isn't gonna be easy for me either. Strange to think a cat can become such an important part of someone's life.

 

I had the same thing happen, only it was my boxer who we had put to sleep on November 8th. My son who will be 4 was with us when we had it done, I did not let him watch, but he saw our dog was suffering and understood as much as a 4 year old can. We explained to him that Ginger was going to be in dog heaven and would't be in pain anymore. He knows that Ginger is gone, so we went out yesterday a got him a new boxer puppy, so he could grow up with. It truly was one of the hardest things we had to go through. I feel your pain. Good luck with everything, I know things will get better with time.

[manicego]

>> Just wondering if any of you here with young kids have had to put a pet to sleep? I explained to my son that while he is in school tomorrow I as going to have to put our cat to sleep. I'm not sure if I handled it correctly or not. I though it only fair to let him know...so he could say his final farewell to to her. Although now I'm not sure that was a good idea. It's almost 10:30 PM here and about 10 minutes ago he cried himself to sleep. At 7 years old he hasn't had to deal with death in any for yet. He did tell me he wanted to help me dig the cat's grave after he got home from school.

 

How has any of you dealt with a situation like this?

 

I've had this cat for about 17 years... I'm OK with my decision right now, but I know when tomorrow gets here it isn't gonna be easy for me either. Strange to think a cat can become such an important part of someone's life. <<

 

Don't have any kids (that I know of ... rimshot) but I'd say you handled it about as well as possible. Let him dig the grave as it'll be as theraputic as possible for a 7 year old. Putting down a pet for a person at ANY age sucks when you're close to the pet. We've put down 3 dogs in the past 5 years (2 old age and 1 behaviour issues) and it was heartbreaking everytime.

[Axelinger]

Had to put down two dogs within about 4 months of each other a couple of years back. They were half-sisters, and had been with us for years. The oldest was 15, and at roughly 85 pounds, the legs had gone, and she was unable to function. That trek to the vet's was pure torture. Four months later, her half-sister wouldn't lie down anymore because she found it impossible to get back up again. She went downhill almost overnight, necessitating another horrific jaunt to the vet's. Pure misery every mile of the way; the most awful experience for any pet owner. We got a Black Lab puppy with blue eyes a month or so later and you'd be hard-pressed to find a less-intelligent canine in existence, but when that time comes in another 10 years or so, it'll be another exercise in damnation all over again. Enjoy 'em while they have their health, for they'll depend upon you for that final journey when they don't.

[Dave]

All I can say mate is that you have dealt with it very well.

There is no easy way to do it and yes, it will rip the little guys heart out in the short term but I can guarantee you that in the long term he will be so glad he got to say his goodbye's.

How do I know, because when I was young the same thing happened with one of our dogs. It had a terminal illness and mum thinking it was the right thing to do knowing that we absolutely loved this dog and it would have destroyed us knowing she was dying, took her to the vet to have her put down without telling us it was happening, just to protect us from the hurt.

Well it did absolutely devastate me when I got home that day to find her no longer there and it took me months to get over it and to this day I wish I had of got to say my goodbyes to her even knowing how hard that would have been.

So to you mate, I'd say you have done the right thing.

[Wotty]

My sympathy to all.Losing a pet is very difficult and emotional.............

[Fat Freddy]

First off, my sympathies to you and your son... I know this can be a tough thing to do. We had to put our older cat to sleep earlier this year and my five year old took it really hard. The cat had been sick for a while (he'd had recurring ear infections for quite a while that were driving him crazy; he would scratch his ears until they were bloody, and he had been wearing a "cone" around his neck for the last month of his life) so my son understood that this was something that had to be done, but it was still a rough time. We probably should've pulled the trigger on the poor cat at least a month before we finally did, but we chose to let him hang around a few extra weeks because it was during the holiday season and we didn't want to ruin my kid's Christmas by doing it then. My wife took the cat to the vet to do the deed and my son tried to be the Brave Little Man about it but as soon as my wife walked out the door my son broke down. We just held each other and I let him have a good cry. (Hell, I cried too.)

 

Here's an idea you might want to try: On her way home from the vet's my wife stopped at the store and bought a collage photo frame, then the three of us looked through our photo albums for cool pictures of "Lester" to fill the frame with. That was very therapeutic for my son, who smiled and laughed as he remembered when and where many of the photos were taken. That collage now hangs on our living room wall. We also let him pick out one favorite picture of Lester and let him hang it on his bedroom wall, so "Lester can still be with me when I sleep." Even all these months later, he occasionally still pats the photo before he goes to bed and sez "G'nite, Lester."

[Widda]

I think you have handled the situation very well. our cat got run over:(. horrible when you are 5 or 6.

[Blue Charvel]

Had to put down two dogs within about 4 months of each other a couple of years back. They were half-sisters, and had been with us for years. The oldest was 15, and at roughly 85 pounds, the legs had gone, and she was unable to function. That trek to the vet's was pure torture. Four months later, her half-sister wouldn't lie down anymore because she found it impossible to get back up again. She went downhill almost overnight, necessitating another horrific jaunt to the vet's. Pure misery every mile of the way; the most awful experience for any pet owner. We got a Black Lab puppy with blue eyes a month or so later and you'd be hard-pressed to find a less-intelligent canine in existence, but when that time comes in another 10 years or so, it'll be another exercise in damnation all over again. Enjoy 'em while they have their health, for they'll depend upon you for that final journey when they don't.

Had the same thing happen to our Rotty at 15 or so a couple years ago. Legs just didn't work anymore. That was one of the saddest days of my life taking her for the last ride to the vet.

 

Sounds like you handled it as well as anyone could Dave, my daughter was too young to really understand at that point, but she vaguely remembers Amber. Crap, this is making me a little teary just thinking about it.

[aMetalhead1966]

In the last Year we had to put 3 Dogs down..1 Dog ( Taco) had some serious cancer

in his liver/kidneys and it was the worst thing that I have ever had to do..Words

and Feelings NEVER can convey the utter pain and hopelessness one feels...It is

a loss I have never gotten over or ever will....

The other 2 dogs were so old (19 and 21) that life for them was struggle to eat and drink

let alone be a dog...I didn't feel as bad cause they were mere shells of themselves..

But with Taco, God it was so hard...I'm gonna go cry now.

[SamboraRocks86]

my family's had to put 3 dogs down in my lifetime (i think), i dont really remember much about the first two.....the first one i was about 2 or 3, so it didnt really affect me, the second dog was one of two that we had, when i was about 6 or 7, and the other was, and still is, my dog....so having her there was a good distraction for me

 

the 3rd dog was the one we got to replace the second dog, a great little collie that my collie loved playing with, they were friends....this time when he was put down i was 10, and that was hard for me, i came home from school one day and couldnt find him (i knew he had to be put down but i never accepted it till then, i thought we had a choice but there wasnt any) he used to get seizures and bite people when certain sounds went off....nothing lethal, but there was the danger that he could attack my little bro who was 5 at the time....i understand now of course.

 

now my dog, the one i mentioned earlier that ive had since i was 5, is getting old.....shes 14 now and losing her undercoat (which is kind of strange for winter so i think its more a sign of age) and tbh, im not sure how id want her to go if i could choose....is it better to wake up one morning and find them curled up somewhere, or to have them put to sleep infront of your eyes..

 

i know that if shes put to sleep that i wanna be there, im the only person in the house she listens to so it would comfort her if i was...and i think ill be ready for it (bearing in mind that ive grown up with this dog)

 

im already planning to get a border collie puppy to take my mind of her when she does go...

 

but this dog still runs around the house like a maniac with her ball, mentally youd think she was still a puppy.....so who knows how long she'll be around..

 

as for how to treat kids in the situation, i dont know....the way my parents did it was good i guess, the pain only lasted from when i got home from school till id slept it off that night, whereas if they know whats coming it most likely stretches it out...

 

but the best remedy IMO is to get another animal, otherwise when theres no cat or dog in the house where they used to be itll only make you and the kids feel bad about it

[Dark Star]

Having a pet put to sleep is Never easy.... I remember when I was 15 or 16, coming home from school to find out Our dog had been put down.. Now, this dog was around 14 or 15 years old at the time, but still I was pretty broken up over it......

 

Hey Keith?? Yer cat was named Lester eh?? I gotta ask.. Was He "Wicked"??

 

Sorry, obscure Kiss reference there to lilghten the mood a lil bit.....

[Fat Freddy]

Hey Keith?? Yer cat was named Lester eh?? I gotta ask.. Was He "Wicked"??

 

Sorry, obscure Kiss reference there to lilghten the mood a lil bit.....

 

Haha, "Lester" already had that name before I even met him, my wife got him from an animal shelter a few years before we got together. No KISS reference that I'm aware of, though he WAS black and white...

 

But seriously, I never thought of myself as a cat person till I moved in with Dawn and got used to having a cat around, but over the years Lester became my main man. My feline brutha. I really miss the little bastardo.

[Mullethead]

My sympathy to all.Losing a pet is very difficult and emotional.............

 

 

 

Couldn't agree more...their like extra children in my household.

[hsf]

My sympathy Dave, to you and your family. I've had to put down too many pets in my lifetime. Never easy, even when you know it's the right/only thing to do.

 

Without kids, I couldn't tell you if how you handled it was "correct", but it certainly seems a good way and very fair to him. When I was younger, the pets were taken to the "farm", where they'd have more room than our little house. Totally bought it, hook, line and sinker too.

 

And I don't know if there is a "right" age to confront death of any loved one for the first time, but it does need to be done and, as long as it's done with care and love, then you can't really worry too much about it being "right". You did what you felt was appropriate and of that you should be happy.

[LV KIX]

Well... I knew that my task ahead of me would be tough... but I didn't think it would be that hard on me. Before school this morning my son spend every spare moment he had saying "goodbye" to our cat. The cat has been around for his entire life. He was pretty teary eyed on the way to school but seemed OK when I dropped him off.

 

After putting "Kasim" to sleep at around noon I wondered all day how my son was going to be aftr school. I decided that I'd tell him the news as soon as we got home...about a 20 minute ride. I had decided that since he loves to listen to loud music in the car that I would let him "turn up the radio" alittle, actually he decided to listed to a CD. I figured that would get us home without him thinking about Kasim.

 

About half way into the first song he asked me to turn the music down. My plan had failed.... He asked about Kasim and I had to break the news early. The poor little guy cried all the way home. As we pulled into the driveway I asked him if he wanted to help me bury our cat. He told me that he really wanted to help. I had already dug a deep hole before going to pick him up from school, so all we would have to do would be to lay the cat to rest and cover the wooded box I had built. My son insisted he help carry the box up to the top of the hill where I had dug the grave. He told me he wanted his own shovel so he could help fill the grave...so back down the hill we went to get him a shovel. He then told me that I should put the first shovel load of dirt on the box since I had the cat since before he was born... so I did. We finished filling the grave and my son asked if we could plant a flower for the cat. Not much as far as flowers go this time of the year in our part of the country... So we decided that a fern would do just fine. We planted the fern and came to the house.

 

After he did his homework we had dinner. After dinner he got his bath and washed his hair. He was sitting at the dinningroom table still feeling a little sad when he yelled out to me. He jumped up and turned on the big outside lights. He screamed "look Dad, it's snowing". Sure enough the snow was coming down and the ground had a light cover. He then looked at me and said... "Dad, Kasim musy already be in Heaven because she made it snow for us. That just about did me in as a little tear started to form. My son noticed and said to me that everything was OK now because Kasim wanted us to know she made it to Heaven. After trying to comfort my son in this situation... in the end, it was he who comforted me.

 

It's really strange how some things in life work...Huh...?

 

KASIM... R.I.P

[manicego]

>> After he did his homework we had dinner. After dinner he got his bath and washed his hair. He was sitting at the dinningroom table still feeling a little sad when he yelled out to me. He jumped up and turned on the big outside lights. He screamed "look Dad, it's snowing". Sure enough the snow was coming down and the ground had a light cover. He then looked at me and said... "Dad, Kasim musy already be in Heaven because she made it snow for us. That just about did me in as a little tear started to form. My son noticed and said to me that everything was OK now because Kasim wanted us to know she made it to Heaven. After trying to comfort my son in this situation... in the end, it was he who comforted me.

 

It's really strange how some things in life work...Huh...?

 

KASIM... R.I.P <<

 

Well, that just about ripped me apart, daaaaaamn. And now a good friend of mine is battling herself on whether or not it's time to put her 12 year old cat down ...

[aMetalhead1966]

Well... I knew that my task ahead of me would be tough... but I didn't think it would be that hard on me. Before school this morning my son spend every spare moment he had saying "goodbye" to our cat. The cat has been around for his entire life. He was pretty teary eyed on the way to school but seemed OK when I dropped him off.

 

After putting "Kasim" to sleep at around noon I wondered all day how my son was going to be aftr school. I decided that I'd tell him the news as soon as we got home...about a 20 minute ride. I had decided that since he loves to listen to loud music in the car that I would let him "turn up the radio" alittle, actually he decided to listed to a CD. I figured that would get us home without him thinking about Kasim.

 

About half way into the first song he asked me to turn the music down. My plan had failed.... He asked about Kasim and I had to break the news early. The poor little guy cried all the way home. As we pulled into the driveway I asked him if he wanted to help me bury our cat. He told me that he really wanted to help. I had already dug a deep hole before going to pick him up from school, so all we would have to do would be to lay the cat to rest and cover the wooded box I had built. My son insisted he help carry the box up to the top of the hill where I had dug the grave. He told me he wanted his own shovel so he could help fill the grave...so back down the hill we went to get him a shovel. He then told me that I should put the first shovel load of dirt on the box since I had the cat since before he was born... so I did. We finished filling the grave and my son asked if we could plant a flower for the cat. Not much as far as flowers go this time of the year in our part of the country... So we decided that a fern would do just fine. We planted the fern and came to the house.

 

After he did his homework we had dinner. After dinner he got his bath and washed his hair. He was sitting at the dinningroom table still feeling a little sad when he yelled out to me. He jumped up and turned on the big outside lights. He screamed "look Dad, it's snowing". Sure enough the snow was coming down and the ground had a light cover. He then looked at me and said... "Dad, Kasim musy already be in Heaven because she made it snow for us. That just about did me in as a little tear started to form. My son noticed and said to me that everything was OK now because Kasim wanted us to know she made it to Heaven. After trying to comfort my son in this situation... in the end, it was he who comforted me.

 

It's really strange how some things in life work...Huh...?

 

KASIM... R.I.P

What a Great Ending to a Touching story...Now I'm off to cry!!

[hsf]

Wow! Really, what an ending to the story. Way too touching.

 

It's nice to hear that some things in life really work out.

[SamboraRocks86]

this is a depressing thread

[cdjunky41]

LV KIX!

I hope time heals you and your family over this loss. My wife and I put our pet to sleep 4 years ago.

This is no joke, he was like a child to me. We adopted my nephew's GUINEA PIG after his fasination with the little hair ball was over. I would have never in a million years thought that we would fall in love with this small animal. I spoiled the shit out of him. We actually made a pen in the living room for him to run around (At night we put him back in the pen due to the lack of pottie training). My wife used to tell me he knew when I came home because he would come running out of his cage to meet me. He also knew I had a never ending supply of cherry tomatos. At night I would watch t.v. with him on my lap. The average GUINEA PIG lasts about 4-5 years. We got a good 5 years out of him, before we had to put him to sleep. He stopped eating due to teeth problems and quickly became skin & bones. My wife tried feeding him with a bottle, but then stopped. She also made a shoe box and wrote on it with colored pens that said WE LOVE YOU-WE WILL MISS YOU with hearts on the box.

I still can't believe a little animal like that made such an impact on my wife and I. We think about getting another one, but we both know it will never be the same.

Thanks for allowing me to share such a special part of my life.

[Nick C]

Flip! I'm choked!!! You have my sympathy Dave.

 

 

We seem to have so many animals these days that pets seem to die pretty regularly. Over the last 6 months or so we've had a goldfish, a hamster and a rabbit die.....the hamster was pretty sad as he was a cute guy, I think Wendy was more upset than Ben, same with the rabbit that we "inherited".

The biggest problem will be Felix when his time is due....which should hopefully be a quite a few years yet, I think he's in early middle age cat wise!

To make up for the rabbit we ended up getting 2 new rabbits and 3 hens!!!

[LV KIX]

Well... It's that time again. Tomorrow morning I will be taking my cat (Edan) to be put to sleep. This one is much tougher than the last one. I have had Edan for over 20 years. Again, my son is heartbroken. I'm taking this one very hard as my cat has been with me most of my adult life. Starange to think how much a cat can mean to someone. My cat has been through everything with me. No mater what she was always there and always loving. My son decided that he wanted to spend the night with his grandmother because he knew he would cry too much if he helped me bury Edan. My son is now 10 years old and he is not taking this well at all. He does understand that it is time and that our cat needs to be put to sleep. He is actually the one who told me it was time. I was going to take Edan in today... but being (maybe) a bit selfish I wanted one more night with her. This kind of thing never gets any easier. Just hard for me to believe that in under 12 hours my pet of 20 years will no longer be here. Even knowing that I am making the right decision at the right time doesn't seem to help me. I am 100% sure I will NEVER have another cat.

 

Once I am done with her burial my son and I will be going out to pick up a red rose to plant at her grave. I just hope I can be strong enough as to not upset my son too much.

[martinsane]

Well... It's that time again. Tomorrow morning I will be taking my cat (Edan) to be put to sleep. This one is much tougher than the last one. I have had Edan for over 20 years. Again, my son is heartbroken. I'm taking this one very hard as my cat has been with me most of my adult life. Starange to think how much a cat can mean to someone. My cat has been through everything with me. No mater what she was always there and always loving. My son decided that he wanted to spend the night with his grandmother because he knew he would cry too much if he helped me bury Edan. My son is now 10 years old and he is not taking this well at all. He does understand that it is time and that our cat needs to be put to sleep. He is actually the one who told me it was time. I was going to take Edan in today... but being (maybe) a bit selfish I wanted one more night with her. This kind of thing never gets any easier. Just hard for me to believe that in under 12 hours my pet of 20 years will no longer be here. Even knowing that I am making the right decision at the right time doesn't seem to help me. I am 100% sure I will NEVER have another cat.

 

Once I am done with her burial my son and I will be going out to pick up a red rose to plant at her grave. I just hope I can be strong enough as to not upset my son too much.

 

 

 

Sorry to hear this Dave. I know how an animal, a cat especially (my cat Bob is inhis late teens), can make an impact on your life and 20 years is a long time.

 

Best of luck to you and your son in coping with your loss.

[Geoff]

Ah Dave, I hate it. Hate to hear stories like this. It's the main reason I never wanted to get any pets in my adult life (though now I have my kitty and two pups, so that didn't work out too well - but what would I do without them anyway?!).

 

All I can say is my thoughts are with you and your son, mate. And good luck holding back the tears for your son, I know I couldn't.