If i was a pom

[Chris]

No wonder I didn't get. Not only am I not another Aussie twat nor am I a POM!!

Dont worry Chris, ill do a poll sometime for biggest jerk...

Thank you Matt. You are a peach!!

[Geoff]

......I tried selecting all of them but it would not allow me

 

I ended up going for the warm beer

Yeah warm beer,what the f**ck is up with that?May as well drink a glass of your own warm piss.

 

Very odd this, as we don't drink warm beer. Some Englishmen drink ale or bitter, i.e. proper beer, rather than lager. Unlike lager, it has the incredible qualities of varying in taste and not being 99% gas. It should be served cool, not warm. In decent pubs it is well below room temperature. At home, I drink it out of the fridge, just a personal preference. It would be disgusting warm.

Another one. What am I missing here? You guys do realise other countries have ales and bitter beers, don't you? Why do you guys keep going on about lagers?

 

'Cause YOU guys keep going on about warm beer!!!!!!!!

Nah, not me mate. Looking at the climate you guys have over there I'd be surprised to hear of a warm anything in England.

[JamesEagle]

'Cause YOU guys keep going on about warm beer!!!!!!!!

Nah, not me mate. Looking at the climate you guys have over there I'd be surprised to hear of a warm anything in England.

 

LOL!

 

(I'd still like it colder though.)

[Glen]

 

Woohoo, Keeley Hazell! Now gimme that warm beer...

Would, eternally. Keeley Hazell and Lucy Pinder are without doubt the best things England have ever contributed to the world.

 

yeah, but not warm lager! If you actually tried some, you might be surprised......most ales are pretty stunning in actual fact.

You do realise we get ales here in Australia too, don't you? I don't understand that statement but am probably just missing something obvious. I agree, ales are generally sensational.

 

......I tried selecting all of them but it would not allow me

I was looking for an 'All of above' option at the bottom too.

 

Where the fuck does the 'warm beer' come from then???? V confused.

[TIM (2)]

Hell, even warm beer is better than XXXX Gold. That stuff is cat's piss.

[edwithmj]

I'd rather be an Englishman than be a descendant of criminals.

 

Personally I'd never go to Australia. Too much desert, the people speak in bastardised English and there are too many poisonous snakes and spiders. Place is a s**t hole.

Culturally, Australia is most well known for producing such crap as Rolf Harris, Neighbours, Home and Away and another 10 dozen poorly acted soap operas. I'd be ashamed to come from the place. Even AC/DC (the only good thing to come from there) isn't technically Australian as Brian Johnson's English and the Young brothers are Scots.

[Dave]

Culturally, Australia is most well known for producing such crap as Rolf Harris, Neighbours, Home and Away and another 10 dozen poorly acted soap operas.

 

That's why we exported them over to you so they would fit in just right over there.

[bangerdave]

I'd rather be an Englishman than be a descendant of criminals.

 

Personally I'd never go to Australia. Too much desert, the people speak in bastardised English and there are too many poisonous snakes and spiders. Place is a s**t hole.

Culturally, Australia is most well known for producing such crap as Rolf Harris, Neighbours, Home and Away and another 10 dozen poorly acted soap operas. I'd be ashamed to come from the place. Even AC/DC (the only good thing to come from there) isn't technically Australian as Brian Johnson's English and the Young brothers are Scots.

That's not very sporting of you old chap,a cultured and schooled Englishman of your standing should never lower themselves to mud slinging with commoners such as convicts.Very un English of you old chap now go have a cup of tea and a good lie down or i will get the nanny to spank your bot bot old boy.

[Dave]

I'd rather be an Englishman than be a descendant of criminals.

 

Personally I'd never go to Australia. Too much desert, the people speak in bastardised English and there are too many poisonous snakes and spiders. Place is a s**t hole.

Culturally, Australia is most well known for producing such crap as Rolf Harris, Neighbours, Home and Away and another 10 dozen poorly acted soap operas. I'd be ashamed to come from the place. Even AC/DC (the only good thing to come from there) isn't technically Australian as Brian Johnson's English and the Young brothers are Scots.

That's not very sporting of you old chap,a cultured and schooled Englishman of your standing should never lower themselves to mud slinging with commoners such as convicts.Very un English of you old chap now go have a cup of tea and a good lie down or i will get the nanny to spank your bot bot old boy.

 

[JamesEagle]

Where the fuck does the 'warm beer' come from then???? V confused.

 

Ale/bitter shouldn't be served warm, although it's not as cold as lager. It's supposed to be served cool, although in some pubs it can be warmer than in others. If it's warm the pub isn't serving it right. Unfortunately there are lots of pubs that don't look after their beer or serve it at the right temperature, which is probably where our reputation for warm beer comes from.

 

 

[Wotty]

If the decendants hadn't livestock "worried", then you'd still be English !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[bangerdave]

If the decendants hadn't livestock "worried", then you'd still be English !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Wotty,i think you watched Animal Farm too many times back in the day.

[Wotty]

If the decendants hadn't livestock "worried", then you'd still be English !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Wotty,i think you watched Animal Farm too many times back in the day.

[JamesEagle]

Is there an "If I was an Aussie" equivalent of this thread?

[Wotty]

Is there an "If I was an Aussie" equivalent of this thread?

Too deep........

[Jez]

Is there an "If I was an Aussie" equivalent of this thread?

 

Fuck me, how embarassing would that be.

 

 

 

If I was an Aus.. Haha can't even type it

[Glen]

Is there an "If I was an Aussie" equivalent of this thread?

 

Fuck me, how embarassing would that be.

 

 

 

If I was an Aus.. Haha can't even type it

 

I dont think anyone could even be bothered to think about it............

[Geoff]

I'd rather be an Englishman than be a descendant of criminals.

 

Personally I'd never go to Australia. Too much desert, the people speak in bastardised English and there are too many poisonous snakes and spiders. Place is a s**t hole.

Culturally, Australia is most well known for producing such crap as Rolf Harris, Neighbours, Home and Away and another 10 dozen poorly acted soap operas. I'd be ashamed to come from the place. Even AC/DC (the only good thing to come from there) isn't technically Australian as Brian Johnson's English and the Young brothers are Scots.

Haha. And there we have it. The ultimate cliche. When people make idiotic statements like that what do you actually think? That the convicts actually out-numbered the non-convicts that settled here? If not, why did they not just over-run their captors and rule the land? It is just so stupid. You do realise that there were more "normal" English people here that are more likely our descendants, don't you?

 

And so there were convicts here 200 years ago we're now all part convict? So do I make a sweeping generalization that because you appear to be as intelligent as a squirrel that every Englishman is as intelligent as a squirrel? Smarten up, mate.

 

"Too much desert"? HAHA! Well then get out of the desert, like majority of us have. What are you talking about? Too many snakes and poisonous spiders? What kind of pussy are you? Do you hate Africa too because they have lions and tigers that might eat you? HAHA! You know snow will kill you too if you lie under it and let it cover you?

 

And what is England so well known for, culturally? A couple of over-rated comedies? All I ever see here from the UK is totally unwatchable and actually worse quality than (admittedly generally terrible) Aussie TV.

 

I'd be ashamed to come from the place. Why? What have I got to be ashamed about? I'd be ashamed to make comments as stupid as that.

 

Place is a shithole, says the man from England, about Australia. Only place that seems to be a shithole is your warped mind, mate.

[Glen]

I'd rather be an Englishman than be a descendant of criminals.

 

Personally I'd never go to Australia. Too much desert, the people speak in bastardised English and there are too many poisonous snakes and spiders. Place is a s**t hole.

Culturally, Australia is most well known for producing such crap as Rolf Harris, Neighbours, Home and Away and another 10 dozen poorly acted soap operas. I'd be ashamed to come from the place. Even AC/DC (the only good thing to come from there) isn't technically Australian as Brian Johnson's English and the Young brothers are Scots.

Haha. And there we have it. The ultimate cliche. When people make idiotic statements like that what do you actually think? That the convicts actually out-numbered the non-convicts that settled here? If not, why did they not just over-run their captors and rule the land? It is just so stupid. You do realise that there were more "normal" English people here that are more likely our descendants, don't you?

 

And so there were convicts here 200 years ago we're now all part convict? So do I make a sweeping generalization that because you appear to be as intelligent as a squirrel that every Englishman is as intelligent as a squirrel? Smarten up, mate.

 

"Too much desert"? HAHA! Well then get out of the desert, like majority of us have. What are you talking about? Too many snakes and poisonous spiders? What kind of pussy are you? Do you hate Africa too because they have lions and tigers that might eat you? HAHA! You know snow will kill you too if you lie under it and let it cover you?

 

And what is England so well known for, culturally? A couple of over-rated comedies? All I ever see here from the UK is totally unwatchable and actually worse quality than (admittedly generally terrible) Aussie TV.

 

I'd be ashamed to come from the place. Why? What have I got to be ashamed about? I'd be ashamed to make comments as stupid as that.

 

Place is a shithole, says the man from England, about Australia. Only place that seems to be a shithole is your warped mind, mate.

 

Not his finest moment eh? At least we try to keep it tongue firmly in cheek.

 

Anyway, back to the warm beer LOL!

[Jez]

I'd rather be an Englishman than be a descendant of criminals.

 

Personally I'd never go to Australia. Too much desert, the people speak in bastardised English and there are too many poisonous snakes and spiders. Place is a s**t hole.

Culturally, Australia is most well known for producing such crap as Rolf Harris, Neighbours, Home and Away and another 10 dozen poorly acted soap operas. I'd be ashamed to come from the place. Even AC/DC (the only good thing to come from there) isn't technically Australian as Brian Johnson's English and the Young brothers are Scots.

Haha. And there we have it. The ultimate cliche. When people make idiotic statements like that what do you actually think? That the convicts actually out-numbered the non-convicts that settled here? If not, why did they not just over-run their captors and rule the land? It is just so stupid. You do realise that there were more "normal" English people here that are more likely our descendants, don't you?

 

And so there were convicts here 200 years ago we're now all part convict? So do I make a sweeping generalization that because you appear to be as intelligent as a squirrel that every Englishman is as intelligent as a squirrel? Smarten up, mate.

 

"Too much desert"? HAHA! Well then get out of the desert, like majority of us have. What are you talking about? Too many snakes and poisonous spiders? What kind of pussy are you? Do you hate Africa too because they have lions and tigers that might eat you? HAHA! You know snow will kill you too if you lie under it and let it cover you?

 

And what is England so well known for, culturally? A couple of over-rated comedies? All I ever see here from the UK is totally unwatchable and actually worse quality than (admittedly generally terrible) Aussie TV.

 

I'd be ashamed to come from the place. Why? What have I got to be ashamed about? I'd be ashamed to make comments as stupid as that.

 

Place is a shithole, says the man from England, about Australia. Only place that seems to be a shithole is your warped mind, mate.

 

Not his finest moment eh? At least we try to keep it tongue firmly in cheek.

 

Anyway, back to the warm beer LOL!

 

If ya dish it out, expect to get it back, I think they say

[Geoff]

I'd rather be an Englishman than be a descendant of criminals.

 

Personally I'd never go to Australia. Too much desert, the people speak in bastardised English and there are too many poisonous snakes and spiders. Place is a s**t hole.

Culturally, Australia is most well known for producing such crap as Rolf Harris, Neighbours, Home and Away and another 10 dozen poorly acted soap operas. I'd be ashamed to come from the place. Even AC/DC (the only good thing to come from there) isn't technically Australian as Brian Johnson's English and the Young brothers are Scots.

Haha. And there we have it. The ultimate cliche. When people make idiotic statements like that what do you actually think? That the convicts actually out-numbered the non-convicts that settled here? If not, why did they not just over-run their captors and rule the land? It is just so stupid. You do realise that there were more "normal" English people here that are more likely our descendants, don't you?

 

And so there were convicts here 200 years ago we're now all part convict? So do I make a sweeping generalization that because you appear to be as intelligent as a squirrel that every Englishman is as intelligent as a squirrel? Smarten up, mate.

 

"Too much desert"? HAHA! Well then get out of the desert, like majority of us have. What are you talking about? Too many snakes and poisonous spiders? What kind of pussy are you? Do you hate Africa too because they have lions and tigers that might eat you? HAHA! You know snow will kill you too if you lie under it and let it cover you?

 

And what is England so well known for, culturally? A couple of over-rated comedies? All I ever see here from the UK is totally unwatchable and actually worse quality than (admittedly generally terrible) Aussie TV.

 

I'd be ashamed to come from the place. Why? What have I got to be ashamed about? I'd be ashamed to make comments as stupid as that.

 

Place is a shithole, says the man from England, about Australia. Only place that seems to be a shithole is your warped mind, mate.

 

Not his finest moment eh? At least we try to keep it tongue firmly in cheek.

 

Anyway, back to the warm beer LOL!

 

If ya dish it out, expect to get it back, I think they say

Backed. And if ya dish out nonsense expect a reply.

 

That "shithole" comment is stupid, though. I'd like edwithmj to find one person that's been to Australia to actually verify that about one of the most beautiful places on Earth.

 

I can only speak from what I know, and every British person I've met has loved Australia and dreaded going back to the UK and similarly, every Aussie I know who's been to the UK had fun in the pubs there but couldn't wait to get back home to Australia.

 

Calling any place in the South Pacific a "shithole" is as good an admission of obliviousness as I've seen.

[JamesEagle]

I'd rather be an Englishman than be a descendant of criminals.

 

Personally I'd never go to Australia. Too much desert, the people speak in bastardised English and there are too many poisonous snakes and spiders. Place is a s**t hole.

Culturally, Australia is most well known for producing such crap as Rolf Harris, Neighbours, Home and Away and another 10 dozen poorly acted soap operas. I'd be ashamed to come from the place. Even AC/DC (the only good thing to come from there) isn't technically Australian as Brian Johnson's English and the Young brothers are Scots.

Haha. And there we have it. The ultimate cliche. When people make idiotic statements like that what do you actually think? That the convicts actually out-numbered the non-convicts that settled here? If not, why did they not just over-run their captors and rule the land? It is just so stupid. You do realise that there were more "normal" English people here that are more likely our descendants, don't you?

 

And so there were convicts here 200 years ago we're now all part convict? So do I make a sweeping generalization that because you appear to be as intelligent as a squirrel that every Englishman is as intelligent as a squirrel? Smarten up, mate.

 

"Too much desert"? HAHA! Well then get out of the desert, like majority of us have. What are you talking about? Too many snakes and poisonous spiders? What kind of pussy are you? Do you hate Africa too because they have lions and tigers that might eat you? HAHA! You know snow will kill you too if you lie under it and let it cover you?

 

And what is England so well known for, culturally? A couple of over-rated comedies? All I ever see here from the UK is totally unwatchable and actually worse quality than (admittedly generally terrible) Aussie TV.

 

I'd be ashamed to come from the place. Why? What have I got to be ashamed about? I'd be ashamed to make comments as stupid as that.

 

Place is a shithole, says the man from England, about Australia. Only place that seems to be a shithole is your warped mind, mate.

 

 

Quality post. (Except the TV bit, I do think a lot of our television is really good, although there is a lot of shite as well. Blackadder, Father Ted and a few others are absolute gold, so I wouldn't call them overrated.)

 

And you are spot in in your other post - everyone I've spoken to who has been to Oz has loved it and wants to go back. My wife would love to live in Sydney, her favourite place in the world.

 

I love my country, but hate living here - it is ridiculously overcrowded and expensive.

[TIM (2)]

Backed. And if ya dish out nonsense expect a reply.

 

That "shithole" comment is stupid, though. I'd like edwithmj to find one person that's been to Australia to actually verify that about one of the most beautiful places on Earth.

 

I can only speak from what I know, and every British person I've met has loved Australia and dreaded going back to the UK and similarly, every Aussie I know who's been to the UK had fun in the pubs there but couldn't wait to get back home to Australia.

 

Calling any place in the South Pacific a "shithole" is as good an admission of obliviousness as I've seen.

 

Yep count me into that! Culturally it's one of the closest places to England that you can find - which is why so many Brits go & live there - but with nicer weather and much better scenery. In fact I'd go live in Sydney in a heartbeat. I know a lot of Aussies who work in London and they come here for the job opportunities more than anything, as you're more likely to get Global companies based here, but none would live here longer-term. And I don't blame them! I am hugely patriotic and I LOVE beating the Aussies at sport as they're a pretty cocky bunch and need bringing back down-to-earth sometimes, but frankly they live in a much nicer part of the world than we do....

[Glen]

Backed. And if ya dish out nonsense expect a reply.

 

That "shithole" comment is stupid, though. I'd like edwithmj to find one person that's been to Australia to actually verify that about one of the most beautiful places on Earth.

 

I can only speak from what I know, and every British person I've met has loved Australia and dreaded going back to the UK and similarly, every Aussie I know who's been to the UK had fun in the pubs there but couldn't wait to get back home to Australia.

 

Calling any place in the South Pacific a "shithole" is as good an admission of obliviousness as I've seen.

 

Yep count me into that! Culturally it's one of the closest places to England that you can find - which is why so many Brits go & live there - but with nicer weather and much better scenery. In fact I'd go live in Sydney in a heartbeat. I know a lot of Aussies who work in London and they come here for the job opportunities more than anything, as you're more likely to get Global companies based here, but none would live here longer-term. And I don't blame them! I am hugely patriotic and I LOVE beating the Aussies at sport as they're a pretty cocky bunch and need bringing back down-to-earth sometimes, but frankly they live in a much nicer part of the world than we do....

 

I used to work next to an Aussie and she loved London and really misses it now she is back in Oz. There's no argument that Oz is the more beautiful place scenery wise, but personally I know full stop that i couldnt handle the heat! Anything above 30 and im dying of heat exhaustion lol! I know a lot of people moan about the weather in England, but actually we have it pretty good in comparison to most places in the world. Mild winters (normally....this year has been a bastard!), pleasant, not overly hot summers, no hurricanes/tornados/droughts...you name it.

[Jez]

Never been to Oz, but know loads of people who have with varying reports from fantastic to not so great (probably like most places and down to personal opinion). Of all the places in the world I have been to so far, I know where I would like to be and I am here to be honest. England may not live up to Australia in all it's beauty, but no denying there are some really fantastic places on the beautiful island of ours.