Let's Discuss Eric Brittingham

[Fat Freddy]

Eric Brittingham wears a cup not to protect himself, but to protect the players on the other team.

 

When Eric Brittingham goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe, and instead requests a hand gun and a bucket.

 

The word "lesbian" derives from an old Latin phrase that roughly translates as "She who has not yet been introduced to Eric Brittingham."

 

The popular videogame "Doom" is based loosely around the time Satan borrowed two bucks from Eric Brittingham and forgot to pay him back.

 

Eric Brittingham doesn't have a computer, just a basement full of Asian kids that memorize numbers.

 

Eric Brittingham sleeps once every 2 weeks, for half an hour, standing up, with his eyes open, and he looks pissed off.

 

Eric Brittingham always asks for the same Christmas gift: A box of Smurfs and a sledgehammer.

 

Eric Brittingham coined the phrase "Pardon my French" after picking up a French man and using him like a bat to club people.

 

When he was nine, Eric Brittingham dressed as himself to go trick-or-treating. He came home with a bag full of candy, a bag full of miniature liquor bottles, an Irish Setter, and two underage prostitutes carrying more of his candy.

 

Eric Brittingham can predict the shuffle on his iPod.

 

As part of his morning exercise routine, Eric Brittingham stretches by defeating 20 armed ninjas that jump out of various household appliances.

 

Eric Brittingham likes his emo kids sunny side up.

 

Leap years are caused by Eric Brittingham holding the earth back from rotating.

 

There are only four horsemen of the apocalypse, because Eric Brittingham is going to walk.

 

Eric Brittingham does not believe that there are 50 states, only 2, because where ever he goes becomes a State of Emergency and whenever he leaves, he leaves a State of Destruction

 

At the Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Championship, Japanese champion competitive eater Takeru Kobayashi set a world record when he ate 53.5 hot dogs in 12 minutes. Given the same amount of time, Eric Brittingham ate Kobayashi.

 

Eric Brittingham’s edition of the VH1 show 'Where Are They Now' was the shortest in the show's history. It was 10 seconds long, and consisted of a black screen with the words "Right Behind You" written on it.

 

Eric Brittingham never takes showers. Instead, whenever he's dirty, he points to himself and shouts, "CLEAN!"

 

Eric Brittingham eats turkey everyday except for the last Thursday of every November. This day is known as "Thanks For Giving Us A Chance To Eat Turkey, Eric Brittingham", but was later shortened to "Thanksgiving" for the sake of brevity.

 

Eric Brittingham is strong enough for a man, but made for a woman.

[Blue Charvel]

Dude, you f'n RULE!

 

No Eric, I didn't mean more than you... hey... ow... your hurting me... hey... that hair is pointy... watch it... ack!

[heaven&hell]

Eric Brittingham wears a cup not to protect himself, but to protect the players on the other team.

 

When Eric Brittingham goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe, and instead requests a hand gun and a bucket.

 

The word "lesbian" derives from an old Latin phrase that roughly translates as "She who has not yet been introduced to Eric Brittingham."

 

The popular videogame "Doom" is based loosely around the time Satan borrowed two bucks from Eric Brittingham and forgot to pay him back.

 

Eric Brittingham doesn't have a computer, just a basement full of Asian kids that memorize numbers.

 

Eric Brittingham sleeps once every 2 weeks, for half an hour, standing up, with his eyes open, and he looks pissed off.

 

Eric Brittingham always asks for the same Christmas gift: A box of Smurfs and a sledgehammer.

 

Eric Brittingham coined the phrase "Pardon my French" after picking up a French man and using him like a bat to club people.

 

When he was nine, Eric Brittingham dressed as himself to go trick-or-treating. He came home with a bag full of candy, a bag full of miniature liquor bottles, an Irish Setter, and two underage prostitutes carrying more of his candy.

 

Eric Brittingham can predict the shuffle on his iPod.

 

As part of his morning exercise routine, Eric Brittingham stretches by defeating 20 armed ninjas that jump out of various household appliances.

 

Eric Brittingham likes his emo kids sunny side up.

 

Leap years are caused by Eric Brittingham holding the earth back from rotating.

 

There are only four horsemen of the apocalypse, because Eric Brittingham is going to walk.

 

Eric Brittingham does not believe that there are 50 states, only 2, because where ever he goes becomes a State of Emergency and whenever he leaves, he leaves a State of Destruction

 

At the Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Championship, Japanese champion competitive eater Takeru Kobayashi set a world record when he ate 53.5 hot dogs in 12 minutes. Given the same amount of time, Eric Brittingham ate Kobayashi.

 

Eric Brittingham’s edition of the VH1 show 'Where Are They Now' was the shortest in the show's history. It was 10 seconds long, and consisted of a black screen with the words "Right Behind You" written on it.

 

Eric Brittingham never takes showers. Instead, whenever he's dirty, he points to himself and shouts, "CLEAN!"

 

Eric Brittingham eats turkey everyday except for the last Thursday of every November. This day is known as "Thanks For Giving Us A Chance To Eat Turkey, Eric Brittingham", but was later shortened to "Thanksgiving" for the sake of brevity.

 

Eric Brittingham is strong enough for a man, but made for a woman.

 

 

Thank God, I mean Eric Brittingham for this awesome thread and for the air we breathe.

 

Seriously someone should email a link to this thread to Cinderella's website.

I really would like to know what Eric would think about all of this.

[Geoff]

That was possibly my favourite batch yet. Laughter makes the world go round, after it gains permission from Eric Brittingham.

[Dave]

It even has one of Heavy Harmonies most talked about Rock Stars.

 

 

 

Eric Brittingham / Cinderella

Has a VERY nice package and can go all night! Perfect in size and length. He's a gentleman, and he's very affectionate. He's not too pushy, and when you're with him, you are the most important person in the world. He'll also still hang out with you afterwards. I've always heard good things about Eric, plus he hates Slaughter, so he sounds like a really cool guy. On a scale of 1-10, he's a 9!

 

 

I think it is time that this be resurfaced because going by alot of comments here, I think this survey was completed by several members of the HH forums

 

It also looks like he might have a very cheap copy of "Stick It To Ya" to sell aswell........any takers

[JustJason]

Eric Brittingham wears a cup not to protect himself, but to protect the players on the other team.

 

When Eric Brittingham goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe, and instead requests a hand gun and a bucket.

 

The word "lesbian" derives from an old Latin phrase that roughly translates as "She who has not yet been introduced to Eric Brittingham."

 

The popular videogame "Doom" is based loosely around the time Satan borrowed two bucks from Eric Brittingham and forgot to pay him back.

 

Eric Brittingham doesn't have a computer, just a basement full of Asian kids that memorize numbers.

 

Eric Brittingham sleeps once every 2 weeks, for half an hour, standing up, with his eyes open, and he looks pissed off.

 

Eric Brittingham always asks for the same Christmas gift: A box of Smurfs and a sledgehammer.

 

Eric Brittingham coined the phrase "Pardon my French" after picking up a French man and using him like a bat to club people.

 

When he was nine, Eric Brittingham dressed as himself to go trick-or-treating. He came home with a bag full of candy, a bag full of miniature liquor bottles, an Irish Setter, and two underage prostitutes carrying more of his candy.

 

Eric Brittingham can predict the shuffle on his iPod.

 

As part of his morning exercise routine, Eric Brittingham stretches by defeating 20 armed ninjas that jump out of various household appliances.

 

Eric Brittingham likes his emo kids sunny side up.

 

Leap years are caused by Eric Brittingham holding the earth back from rotating.

 

There are only four horsemen of the apocalypse, because Eric Brittingham is going to walk.

 

Eric Brittingham does not believe that there are 50 states, only 2, because where ever he goes becomes a State of Emergency and whenever he leaves, he leaves a State of Destruction

 

At the Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Championship, Japanese champion competitive eater Takeru Kobayashi set a world record when he ate 53.5 hot dogs in 12 minutes. Given the same amount of time, Eric Brittingham ate Kobayashi.

 

Eric Brittingham’s edition of the VH1 show 'Where Are They Now' was the shortest in the show's history. It was 10 seconds long, and consisted of a black screen with the words "Right Behind You" written on it.

 

Eric Brittingham never takes showers. Instead, whenever he's dirty, he points to himself and shouts, "CLEAN!"

 

Eric Brittingham eats turkey everyday except for the last Thursday of every November. This day is known as "Thanks For Giving Us A Chance To Eat Turkey, Eric Brittingham", but was later shortened to "Thanksgiving" for the sake of brevity.

 

Eric Brittingham is strong enough for a man, but made for a woman.

 

 

Thank God, I mean Eric Brittingham for this awesome thread and for the air we breathe.

 

Seriously someone should email a link to this thread to Cinderella's website.

I really would like to know what Eric would think about all of this.

 

 

I sent a link to his website over a year ago.

[Fat Freddy]

I sent a link to his website over a year ago.

 

Are you saying that Eric is too busy to bask in our adulation?

[Fat Freddy]

Eric Brittingham’s calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd, skipping April 1st (April Fool's Day). This is because no one fools Eric Brittingham.

 

Some kids piss their name in the snow. Eric Brittingham can piss his name into concrete.

 

Eric Brittingham once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now known simply as The Islands.

 

Once, while having sex in a tractor-trailer, some of Eric Brittingham’s sperm escaped and got into the engine. We now know this truck as Optimus Prime.

 

If you spell Eric Brittingham wrong on Google it doesn't say, "Did you mean Eric Brittingham?" It simply replies, "Run while you still have the chance."

 

Once a cobra bit Eric Brittingham’s leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died.

 

If it looks like chicken, tastes like chicken, and feels like chicken but Eric Brittingham says its beef, then you better believe, it's f**king beef.

 

If you play Cinderella’s “Don’t’ Know What You’ve Got (Til It’s Gone)" backwards, you will hear Eric Brittingham banging your Mom.

 

Eric Brittingham’s dog is trained to pick up his own poop because Eric Brittingham will not take shit from anyone.

 

Eric Brittingham is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like Eric Brittingham.

 

Eric Brittingham can strangle you with a cordless phone.

 

Eric Brittingham is 1/8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with his ancestry; he ate a Jeep.

 

M.C. Hammer learned the hard way that Eric Brittingham CAN touch this.

 

Eric Brittingham can drown a fish.

 

When Eric Brittingham enters a room, he doesn't turn the lights on, he turns the dark off.

 

Eric Brittingham is currently in a legal battle with the makers of Bubble Tape gum. Eric Brittingham claims that "6 Feet of Fun" is actually the trademarked description of his penis.

 

Eric Brittingham cannot predict the future; the future just better f**king do what Eric Brittingham says.

 

The reason Cinderella has never won a Grammy is because nobody in their right mind would willingly give Eric Brittingham a blunt metal object. That’s just suicide.

[heaven&hell]

Eric Brittingham wears a cup not to protect himself, but to protect the players on the other team.

 

When Eric Brittingham goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe, and instead requests a hand gun and a bucket.

 

The word "lesbian" derives from an old Latin phrase that roughly translates as "She who has not yet been introduced to Eric Brittingham."

 

The popular videogame "Doom" is based loosely around the time Satan borrowed two bucks from Eric Brittingham and forgot to pay him back.

 

Eric Brittingham doesn't have a computer, just a basement full of Asian kids that memorize numbers.

 

Eric Brittingham sleeps once every 2 weeks, for half an hour, standing up, with his eyes open, and he looks pissed off.

 

Eric Brittingham always asks for the same Christmas gift: A box of Smurfs and a sledgehammer.

 

Eric Brittingham coined the phrase "Pardon my French" after picking up a French man and using him like a bat to club people.

 

When he was nine, Eric Brittingham dressed as himself to go trick-or-treating. He came home with a bag full of candy, a bag full of miniature liquor bottles, an Irish Setter, and two underage prostitutes carrying more of his candy.

 

Eric Brittingham can predict the shuffle on his iPod.

 

As part of his morning exercise routine, Eric Brittingham stretches by defeating 20 armed ninjas that jump out of various household appliances.

 

Eric Brittingham likes his emo kids sunny side up.

 

Leap years are caused by Eric Brittingham holding the earth back from rotating.

 

There are only four horsemen of the apocalypse, because Eric Brittingham is going to walk.

 

Eric Brittingham does not believe that there are 50 states, only 2, because where ever he goes becomes a State of Emergency and whenever he leaves, he leaves a State of Destruction

 

At the Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Championship, Japanese champion competitive eater Takeru Kobayashi set a world record when he ate 53.5 hot dogs in 12 minutes. Given the same amount of time, Eric Brittingham ate Kobayashi.

 

Eric Brittingham’s edition of the VH1 show 'Where Are They Now' was the shortest in the show's history. It was 10 seconds long, and consisted of a black screen with the words "Right Behind You" written on it.

 

Eric Brittingham never takes showers. Instead, whenever he's dirty, he points to himself and shouts, "CLEAN!"

 

Eric Brittingham eats turkey everyday except for the last Thursday of every November. This day is known as "Thanks For Giving Us A Chance To Eat Turkey, Eric Brittingham", but was later shortened to "Thanksgiving" for the sake of brevity.

 

Eric Brittingham is strong enough for a man, but made for a woman.

 

 

Thank God, I mean Eric Brittingham for this awesome thread and for the air we breathe.

 

Seriously someone should email a link to this thread to Cinderella's website.

I really would like to know what Eric would think about all of this.

 

 

I sent a link to his website over a year ago.

 

 

Maybe he didn't respond because he had already knew what was posted here.

After all he is Eric Brittingham.

[Fat Freddy]

Maybe he didn't respond because he had already knew what was posted here.

After all he is Eric Brittingham.

 

I prefer to think that he saw this thread but was so overcome with emotion at our displays of worship and devotion that he was speechless.

[CurtisLoew]

a.) I can't believe you all let this thread slip to page 2! Hail Eric!

 

b.) The people responsible for this have no idea what kind of hell is about to be unleashed.

[Fat Freddy]

The people responsible for this have no idea what kind of hell is about to be unleashed.

 

May God have mercy on their souls... because Eric Brittingham most certainly will NOT! Poor bastards!

[Chris]

a.) I can't believe you all let this thread slip to page 2! Hail Eric!

 

b.) The people responsible for this have no idea what kind of hell is about to be unleashed.

:yikes: :yikes: God help the poor bastard. He/She has no idea of the ass-whooping they just inflicted upon themselves.

[aMetalhead1966]

a.) I can't believe you all let this thread slip to page 2! Hail Eric!

 

b.) The people responsible for this have no idea what kind of hell is about to be unleashed.

:yikes: :yikes: God help the poor bastard. He/She has no idea of the ass-whooping they just inflicted upon themselves.

I pity da Fool..

[Fat Freddy]

Eric Brittingham is displeased.

 

 

"Why has no one discussed me since October 11th? Do not let it happen again."

[aMetalhead1966]

Eric Brittingham= brig tint rice ham

[Geoff]

That is such a one-man photo. What are the black fluffy things surrounding Him?

[Fat Freddy]

When Eric Brittingham wants popcorn, he breathes on Nebraska. Similarly, if he wants a baked potato, he breathes on Idaho.

 

Eric Brittingham has a vacation home on the sun.

 

Eric Brittingham does not have chest hair, he has millions of highly venomous nematocysts.

 

Niagra Falls is the result of one of Eric Brittingham’s legendary cannon balls.

 

Eric Brittingham performs colonoscopies on himself.

 

If you were killed by Eric Brittingham, your tombstone would read RIP, ripped into pieces.

 

Eric Brittingham’s smile can bring the dead back to life. Unfortunately, Eric Brittingham has never smiled.

 

Eric Brittingham jumped off the Empire State Building and only sprained his ankle.

 

During the famous “Running of the Bulls” in Pamplona, Spain, the people may be running from the bulls, but the bulls are running from Eric Brittingham.

 

Eric Brittingham can defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.

 

Eric Brittingham doesn't churn butter. He simply glares at the cows till the butter comes straight out.

 

If you spell “Eric Brittingham” in a game of Scrabble, you win. Forever.

 

Eric Brittingham once shot down a German fighter plane by pointing his finger and yelling, "BANG!"

 

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: Eric Brittingham once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and had learned how to kick ass.

 

Faster than a speeding bullet ... more powerful than a locomotive ... able to leap tall buildings in a single bound... yes, these are some of Eric Brittingham’s warm-up exercises.

 

In an average living room there are 1,242 objects that Eric Brittingham could use to kill you.

 

If Eric Brittingham ever has sex with a man, it won't be because he is gay. It will be because he has run out of women.

 

In honor of Eric Brittingham, all McDonald's restaurants now have an even larger size than the super-size. When ordering, just ask to be Ericsized.

 

Wilt Chamberlain claims to have slept with more than 20,000 women in his lifetime. Eric Brittingham calls this "a slow Tuesday."

 

In the beginning there was nothing...then Eric Brittingham slapped that nothing in the face and said "GET A JOB!". That is the story of the universe.

 

Eric Brittingham is expected to win gold in every swimming competition at the 2008 Beijing Olympics, even though Eric Brittingham does not swim. This is because when Eric Brittingham enters the water, the water gets out of his way and Eric Brittingham simply walks across the pool floor.

 

Eric Brittingham wears a live rattlesnake as a condom.

 

Eric Brittingham does not play the lottery. It doesn't have nearly enough balls.

 

There are two types of people in the world... people that suck, and Eric Brittingham.

 

Eric Brittingham once rode a nine foot grizzly bear through an automatic car wash, instead of taking a shower.

[Geoff]

^ More perfection. Damn I love those posts. Eric Brittingham, you complete me.

[heaven&hell]

When Eric Brittingham wants popcorn, he breathes on Nebraska. Similarly, if he wants a baked potato, he breathes on Idaho.

 

Eric Brittingham has a vacation home on the sun.

 

Eric Brittingham does not have chest hair, he has millions of highly venomous nematocysts.

 

Niagra Falls is the result of one of Eric Brittingham’s legendary cannon balls.

 

Eric Brittingham performs colonoscopies on himself.

 

If you were killed by Eric Brittingham, your tombstone would read RIP, ripped into pieces.

 

Eric Brittingham’s smile can bring the dead back to life. Unfortunately, Eric Brittingham has never smiled.

 

Eric Brittingham jumped off the Empire State Building and only sprained his ankle.

 

During the famous “Running of the Bulls” in Pamplona, Spain, the people may be running from the bulls, but the bulls are running from Eric Brittingham.

 

Eric Brittingham can defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.

 

Eric Brittingham doesn't churn butter. He simply glares at the cows till the butter comes straight out.

 

If you spell “Eric Brittingham” in a game of Scrabble, you win. Forever.

 

Eric Brittingham once shot down a German fighter plane by pointing his finger and yelling, "BANG!"

 

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: Eric Brittingham once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and had learned how to kick ass.

 

Faster than a speeding bullet ... more powerful than a locomotive ... able to leap tall buildings in a single bound... yes, these are some of Eric Brittingham’s warm-up exercises.

 

In an average living room there are 1,242 objects that Eric Brittingham could use to kill you.

 

If Eric Brittingham ever has sex with a man, it won't be because he is gay. It will be because he has run out of women.

 

In honor of Eric Brittingham, all McDonald's restaurants now have an even larger size than the super-size. When ordering, just ask to be Ericsized.

 

Wilt Chamberlain claims to have slept with more than 20,000 women in his lifetime. Eric Brittingham calls this "a slow Tuesday."

 

In the beginning there was nothing...then Eric Brittingham slapped that nothing in the face and said "GET A JOB!". That is the story of the universe.

 

Eric Brittingham is expected to win gold in every swimming competition at the 2008 Beijing Olympics, even though Eric Brittingham does not swim. This is because when Eric Brittingham enters the water, the water gets out of his way and Eric Brittingham simply walks across the pool floor.

 

Eric Brittingham wears a live rattlesnake as a condom.

 

Eric Brittingham does not play the lottery. It doesn't have nearly enough balls.

 

There are two types of people in the world... people that suck, and Eric Brittingham.

 

Eric Brittingham once rode a nine foot grizzly bear through an automatic car wash, instead of taking a shower.

 

 

 

[Chris]

When Eric Brittingham wants popcorn, he breathes on Nebraska. Similarly, if he wants a baked potato, he breathes on Idaho.

 

Eric Brittingham has a vacation home on the sun.

 

Eric Brittingham does not have chest hair, he has millions of highly venomous nematocysts.

 

Niagra Falls is the result of one of Eric Brittingham’s legendary cannon balls.

 

Eric Brittingham performs colonoscopies on himself.

 

If you were killed by Eric Brittingham, your tombstone would read RIP, ripped into pieces.

 

Eric Brittingham’s smile can bring the dead back to life. Unfortunately, Eric Brittingham has never smiled.

 

Eric Brittingham jumped off the Empire State Building and only sprained his ankle.

 

During the famous “Running of the Bulls” in Pamplona, Spain, the people may be running from the bulls, but the bulls are running from Eric Brittingham.

 

Eric Brittingham can defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.

 

Eric Brittingham doesn't churn butter. He simply glares at the cows till the butter comes straight out.

 

If you spell “Eric Brittingham” in a game of Scrabble, you win. Forever.

 

Eric Brittingham once shot down a German fighter plane by pointing his finger and yelling, "BANG!"

 

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: Eric Brittingham once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and had learned how to kick ass.

 

Faster than a speeding bullet ... more powerful than a locomotive ... able to leap tall buildings in a single bound... yes, these are some of Eric Brittingham’s warm-up exercises.

 

In an average living room there are 1,242 objects that Eric Brittingham could use to kill you.

 

If Eric Brittingham ever has sex with a man, it won't be because he is gay. It will be because he has run out of women.

 

In honor of Eric Brittingham, all McDonald's restaurants now have an even larger size than the super-size. When ordering, just ask to be Ericsized.

 

Wilt Chamberlain claims to have slept with more than 20,000 women in his lifetime. Eric Brittingham calls this "a slow Tuesday."

 

In the beginning there was nothing...then Eric Brittingham slapped that nothing in the face and said "GET A JOB!". That is the story of the universe.

 

Eric Brittingham is expected to win gold in every swimming competition at the 2008 Beijing Olympics, even though Eric Brittingham does not swim. This is because when Eric Brittingham enters the water, the water gets out of his way and Eric Brittingham simply walks across the pool floor.

 

Eric Brittingham wears a live rattlesnake as a condom.

 

Eric Brittingham does not play the lottery. It doesn't have nearly enough balls.

 

There are two types of people in the world... people that suck, and Eric Brittingham.

 

Eric Brittingham once rode a nine foot grizzly bear through an automatic car wash, instead of taking a shower.

You have way too much time on your hands. GREAT post though...

[RichieZ]

When Eric Brittingham wants popcorn, he breathes on Nebraska. Similarly, if he wants a baked potato, he breathes on Idaho.

 

Eric Brittingham has a vacation home on the sun.

 

Eric Brittingham does not have chest hair, he has millions of highly venomous nematocysts.

 

Niagra Falls is the result of one of Eric Brittingham’s legendary cannon balls.

 

Eric Brittingham performs colonoscopies on himself.

 

If you were killed by Eric Brittingham, your tombstone would read RIP, ripped into pieces.

 

Eric Brittingham’s smile can bring the dead back to life. Unfortunately, Eric Brittingham has never smiled.

 

Eric Brittingham jumped off the Empire State Building and only sprained his ankle.

 

During the famous “Running of the Bulls” in Pamplona, Spain, the people may be running from the bulls, but the bulls are running from Eric Brittingham.

 

Eric Brittingham can defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.

 

Eric Brittingham doesn't churn butter. He simply glares at the cows till the butter comes straight out.

 

If you spell “Eric Brittingham” in a game of Scrabble, you win. Forever.

 

Eric Brittingham once shot down a German fighter plane by pointing his finger and yelling, "BANG!"

 

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: Eric Brittingham once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and had learned how to kick ass.

 

Faster than a speeding bullet ... more powerful than a locomotive ... able to leap tall buildings in a single bound... yes, these are some of Eric Brittingham’s warm-up exercises.

 

In an average living room there are 1,242 objects that Eric Brittingham could use to kill you.

 

If Eric Brittingham ever has sex with a man, it won't be because he is gay. It will be because he has run out of women.

 

In honor of Eric Brittingham, all McDonald's restaurants now have an even larger size than the super-size. When ordering, just ask to be Ericsized.

 

Wilt Chamberlain claims to have slept with more than 20,000 women in his lifetime. Eric Brittingham calls this "a slow Tuesday."

 

In the beginning there was nothing...then Eric Brittingham slapped that nothing in the face and said "GET A JOB!". That is the story of the universe.

 

Eric Brittingham is expected to win gold in every swimming competition at the 2008 Beijing Olympics, even though Eric Brittingham does not swim. This is because when Eric Brittingham enters the water, the water gets out of his way and Eric Brittingham simply walks across the pool floor.

 

Eric Brittingham wears a live rattlesnake as a condom.

 

Eric Brittingham does not play the lottery. It doesn't have nearly enough balls.

 

There are two types of people in the world... people that suck, and Eric Brittingham.

 

Eric Brittingham once rode a nine foot grizzly bear through an automatic car wash, instead of taking a shower.

You have way too much time on your hands. GREAT post though...

 

Classic stuff.

[JustJason]

I have been given hollow possibilities in the past. Now I have been promised a restoral of some time in the AM on the 29th. One second into the PM and if I don't have power I want them to feel your crushing power Eric Brittingham. Smite them and let the sparks from your mighty hammer ignite the power I crave so much. For it would be so nice to heat up a burrito or something in the microwave. Shaving, I would love to shave. It's been almost 3 weeks and I am furry beast. Come to my aid wise and powerful Eric Brittingham.

[Fat Freddy]

There are those who believe... that life here... began OUT THERE.

 

Far across the universe, with tribes of humans who may have been the forefathers of the Egyptians... or the Toltecs... or the Mayans... or even the Brittinghams.

 

There are those who believe that there may yet be Brothers of Brittingham, who even now fight to survive, somewhere beyond the heavens.

[Geoff]

I thank Eric Brittingham for allowing the construction of the bike I ride to the station every morning to take place. Without His artistry I’d have to pay $5 a day extra on bus fares.