Pointless Nonsense

[Geoff]

I saw a guy with a 23 on the back of his jersey somewhere the other day. Can't remember what sport I was watching, but it happened.

 

Was it David Beckham? He always insists on wearing 23 on his back so if anyone asks him what his I.Q is he can easily remember.

I haven't seen soccer for a while, so I'm going to say no. But the antelope's horns rest not until I have my answer.

It was probably LeBron James.

LeBonfire who??? I think it was some NRL player. Or an Aussie basketball player... I was watching that in Melbourne. Bounce, bounce.

[heaven&hell]

I saw a guy with a 23 on the back of his jersey somewhere the other day. Can't remember what sport I was watching, but it happened.

 

Was it David Beckham? He always insists on wearing 23 on his back so if anyone asks him what his I.Q is he can easily remember.

I haven't seen soccer for a while, so I'm going to say no. But the antelope's horns rest not until I have my answer.

It was probably LeBron James.

LeBonfire who??? I think it was some NRL player. Or an Aussie basketball player... I was watching that in Melbourne. Bounce, bounce.

 

 

He's an NBA player, one of the best all around players in the game.

[Geoff]

I saw a guy with a 23 on the back of his jersey somewhere the other day. Can't remember what sport I was watching, but it happened.

 

Was it David Beckham? He always insists on wearing 23 on his back so if anyone asks him what his I.Q is he can easily remember.

I haven't seen soccer for a while, so I'm going to say no. But the antelope's horns rest not until I have my answer.

It was probably LeBron James.

LeBonfire who??? I think it was some NRL player. Or an Aussie basketball player... I was watching that in Melbourne. Bounce, bounce.

 

 

He's an NBA player, one of the best all around players in the game.

That is until this little aboriginal kid I was watching the other day blows the NBA apart with his skillz.

 

I generally really hate basketball, but I didn't mind the Australia vs. New Zealand Olympic qualifiers, because they were actually allowed to play without having time-out called every 17 seconds.

[TIM (2)]

I have just finished my breakfast & now have a 2 hour teleconference on how to complete expenses. It's a fucking riot in this place I tell ya.

[Geoff]

I have just finished my breakfast & now have a 2 hour teleconference on how to complete expenses. It's a fucking riot in this place I tell ya.

I completed my expenses 2 days ago... I pray to jeebers that shit gets in my account asap, tomorrow hopefully. I'm down to the outer skin of my ballsack, in financial terms.

[Nick C]

I'm down to the outer skin of my ballsack, in financial terms.

 

If you colour it green do you think you could get it past the cashier?

[Chris]

I'm down to the outer skin of my ballsack, in financial terms.

 

If you colour it green do you think you could get it past the cashier?

Only if the cashier's a she and she does not mind being tea-bagged.

[Geoff]

I'm down to the outer skin of my ballsack, in financial terms.

 

If you colour it green do you think you could get it past the cashier?

I tried it and she thought I was handing over a green sack of bowling balls. Caused a bit of confusion, as you can imagine.

[Nick C]

Isn't a Big Mac a coat?

[aMetalhead1966]

Isn't a Big Mac a coat?

Only if Ronald McDonald throws it on you.

[heaven&hell]

Isn't a Big Mac a coat?

Only if Ronald McDonald throws it on you.

 

 

Now that's funny.

[aMetalhead1966]

There are 293 ways to make change for a dollar.

[aMetalhead1966]

AMAZING SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES

 

 

 

 

1. If you are choking on an ice cube simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat. Presto! The blockage will instantly remove itself.

 

 

 

 

 

2. Avoid cutting yourself slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold while you chop.

 

 

 

 

 

3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink.

 

 

 

 

 

4. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer.

 

 

 

 

 

5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.

 

 

 

 

 

6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose

of laxatives, then you will be afraid to cough.

 

 

 

 

 

7. You only need two tools in life - WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.

 

 

 

 

 

8. Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

 

 

 

 

 

Daily Thought: SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKIES ... NOT REALLY GOOD FOR ANYTHING BUT THEY BRING A SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN PUSHED DOWN THE STAIRS

[Fat Freddy]

AMAZING SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES

 

 

 

 

1. If you are choking on an ice cube simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat. Presto! The blockage will instantly remove itself.

 

 

 

 

 

2. Avoid cutting yourself slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold while you chop.

 

 

 

 

 

3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink.

 

 

 

 

 

4. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer.

 

 

 

 

 

5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.

 

 

 

 

 

6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose

of laxatives, then you will be afraid to cough.

 

 

 

 

 

7. You only need two tools in life - WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.

 

 

 

 

 

8. Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

 

 

 

 

 

Daily Thought: SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKIES ... NOT REALLY GOOD FOR ANYTHING BUT THEY BRING A SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN PUSHED DOWN THE STAIRS

 

Finally, some practical advice around here!!

[Chris]

AMAZING SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES

 

 

 

 

1. If you are choking on an ice cube simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat. Presto! The blockage will instantly remove itself.

 

 

 

 

 

2. Avoid cutting yourself slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold while you chop.

 

 

 

 

 

3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink.

 

 

 

 

 

4. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer.

 

 

 

 

 

5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.

 

 

 

 

 

6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose

of laxatives, then you will be afraid to cough.

 

 

 

 

 

7. You only need two tools in life - WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.

 

 

 

 

 

8. Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

 

 

 

 

 

Daily Thought: SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKIES ... NOT REALLY GOOD FOR ANYTHING BUT THEY BRING A SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN PUSHED DOWN THE STAIRS

 

Finally, some practical advice around here!!

I'm gonna follow these TO THE LETTER!! Thanks.

[aMetalhead1966]

AMAZING SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES

 

 

 

 

1. If you are choking on an ice cube simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat. Presto! The blockage will instantly remove itself.

 

 

 

 

 

2. Avoid cutting yourself slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold while you chop.

 

 

 

 

 

3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink.

 

 

 

 

 

4. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer.

 

 

 

 

 

5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.

 

 

 

 

 

6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose

of laxatives, then you will be afraid to cough.

 

 

 

 

 

7. You only need two tools in life - WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.

 

 

 

 

 

8. Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

 

 

 

 

 

Daily Thought: SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKIES ... NOT REALLY GOOD FOR ANYTHING BUT THEY BRING A SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN PUSHED DOWN THE STAIRS

 

Finally, some practical advice around here!!

I'm gonna follow these TO THE LETTER!! Thanks.

[Geoff]

If I were a slinky I think it would be just about time to slink down a staircase.

[heaven&hell]

7x3=21 + 2=23.

[Li§a]

I said pom juice, dammit! Not porn juice

[Geoff]

I prefer porn juice, just quietly.

[Nick C]

I think you can get that stuff in cartons at the local supermarket.

[Geoff]

I was born in a carton at the supermarket. I wonder if I was a result of a carton of porn juice spilling into a carton of scrambled eggs. It seems highly likely.

[Chris]

I was born in a carton at the supermarket. I wonder if I was a result of a carton of porn juice spilling into a carton of scrambled eggs. It seems highly likely.

That would certainly explain alot.

[Geoff]

I was born in a carton at the supermarket. I wonder if I was a result of a carton of porn juice spilling into a carton of scrambled eggs. It seems highly likely.

That would certainly explain alot.

Yeah, you're right. It would go a long way to explaining why my eyes are yellow and look like two fried eggs.

[heaven&hell]

Yellow is my favorite color but I rarely wear it.