metalmaniac777

If we do...it better match the carpet. Well, um, what if there isn't any carpet?

I'm only required to compile a Top Ten List for Hardrock Haven, so that's all I did, but for what it's worth, here were/are my picks for 2011: 1. Destrophy: "Cry Havoc" (everything I love about melodic hard rock) 2. Black Stone Cherry: "Between the Devil & the Deep Blue Sea" 3. Emphatic: "Damage" 4. Five Finger Death Punch: "American Capitalist" (pure metal perfection) 5. Shotgun Alley: s/t 6. Machine Head: "Unto the Locust" 7. Sebastian Bach: "Kicking and Screaming" (accused of mediocrity, but I really like it) 8. Reckless Love: "Animal Attraction" (pure, cheesy, catchy fun) 9. Vain: "Enough Rope" (the surprise of the year for me) 10. Toby Hitchcock: "Mercury's Down" Honorable mentions: Anthrax: "Worship Music" (who knew they still had it in 'em?) Egypt Central: "White Rabbit" James Durbin: "Memories of a Beautiful Disaster" (waaaaay better than it has a right to be) Nickelback: "Here and Now" Pop Evil: "War of Angels"

My review of "Bangkok Addiction," the latest offering from Finnish modern sleaze rockers Defuse, is now available over at Hardrock Haven. Click the link below to check it out: Defuse review Or, if you're too lazy--er, I mean, time-challenged --to read the whole thing, in a nutshell they sound like Sick Puppies meets Gemini Five crossed with some retro Sunset Strip metal influence.

Yeah, they definitely sound like my kinda meat. Will have to keep the name in mind. Nice review too by the way. I think you'd like 'em. As stated in my review, the lyrics are fairly cheesy, but not any worse than many a metal band back in the '80s. And hey, they have songs about Freddy Krueger and Leatherface...how can an '80s horror movie afficiando such as yourself even try to resist?

My review of the '80s-inspired Australian heavy metal band Elm Street's debut album, "Barbed Wire Metal," is now available over at Hardrock Haven. Click the link below to check it out: Elm Street review Fans of that oldschool metal sound--I'm lookin' at you, Fat Freddy!--need to check this out ASAP.

You don't have to say it...I'll say it for you.

My review of Swedish heavy metallers Hellspray's new album, "Part of the Solution," is now available over at Hardrock Haven. Click the link below to check it out: Hellspray review Nothing special, but solid enough if you're hankering for some straight-forward metal.

Really? God, I hate that song...worst opening track I've heard in a long time. Thankfully, the rest of the album more than makes up for it.

I generally loathe the prog-metal genre too, but this is just too damn catchy--not to mention the melodic power metal elements dominate the progressive influence--to ignore. The track "30 Pieces of Silver" might just be my favorite Christian metal song of 2011...think I played it at least a dozen times today alone!!

So you loudly preach that we should all simply sit back and ignore Steel Panther's extremely raunchy lyrics for the sake of being entertained by good songs, but you insist you can't listen to these extreme Christian lyrics despite the songs being good? Where I come from, that's called hypocrisy, my friend. And for the record, this album is much better than their last couple, and I am not one bit bothered, embarrassed, or offended by the lyrics. If I'm not bothered by you referring to Seventh Day Slumber as a bunch of God-semen-guzzlers, I'm certainly not bothered by the lyrics on this CD.

My review of Nightvision: "Consequence of Sin" is now available over at Hardrock Haven. Click the link below to check it out: Nightvision review Pretty solid stuff here, sort of an Alter Bridge meets Nickelback sound. Or, as my editor put it when he sent me these guys, "they sound like Nickelback if Nickelback could actually play guitar." (He's not a Nickelback fan.)

My review of the new Theocracy album, "As the World Bleeds," is now available over at Hardrock Haven. Click the link below to check it out: Theocracy review Melodic power metal simply does not get any catchier than this. Amen.

Big Guardian fan here, so thanks for the post. New songs certainly are not a patch on their "Fire & Love" or "Miracle Mile" highlights, but they're pretty solid, and are good enough to keep me interested in another full-length album from these guys.

Well, the most glaring problem with that cover is pretty obvious: there's a pesky chair in the picture...

My review of L.A.-based heavy metallers Crowned By Fire is now available over at Hardrock Haven. Click the link below to check it out: Crowned By Fire review Not exactly HH-friendly material, but the headbangers lurking amongst us will probably find it palatable.

"Make Love Like a Man" ~ Def Leppard What do you think of to avoid cumming too soon?

"Kill Myself" ~ American Anthem What is the best part about being a parent?

"Nothing Better To Do" ~ L.A. Guns What should a woman do with her hands while she is kissing you?

"I'll Sleep When I'm Dead" ~ Bon Jovi What's the first thing you think of when a gorgeous woman takes off her clothes in front of you?

Thanx man, I appreciate it. It's always nice to know that other people besides me and my immediate family are reading my blather (besides, my immediate family doesn't always read'em either...!) OK, I admit it, I read 'em too. You're a good writer and entertaining to read...I'll just put that out there, for whatever it's worth. Personally, I'm waiting for your magnum opus: "Is Geoff Really As Highly Sexual As He Makes Himself Out To Be...Or Is He Actually Overcompensating For Being Totally Impotent?" No doubt Hub records would be shattered...

"Sexdrugsrock'nroll" ~ Shotgun Messiah What do you think of men who get hair plugs?

I do not expect most Vain fans to agree with my statement that "Enough Rope" is better than "No Respect." That album has been out forever and people cannot help but judge it fondly through the filter of nostalgia. But reviews are nothing more than one person's opinion, and in my opinion, "Enough Rope" is the superior CD. What is clear, judging from the comments in this thread thus far, is that everyone agrees it's a good album. I simply cannot imagine any Vain fan failing to be impressed with this latest offering.

Bear in mind that I do not rate the debut nearly as highly as most glam/sleaze/hair metal fans (you & I have had this conversation before). The better production and more hard rock-oriented approach make "Enough Rope" a little more up my alley.

My review of the new Vain album, "Enough Rope," is now available over at Hardrock Haven. Click the link below to check it out: Vain review I've never been the biggest Vain fan, but this was a nice surprise.

If you hate this band, there is absolutely no reason to check this new album out. It's the same sound/style as all their other albums, albeit a little bit better than their last one, in my opinion, more in line with "Ten Thousand Fists" or "Indestructible." But there's nothing on here that's going to change a hater from a lover. It's a really good album...but only if you already like Disturbed.