STRESS RELIEF

[hsf]

How sad is it that I just got my second distance over 1000 (1081.8) and I almost knocked my keyboard off the desk when I shot out of my chair?

[hsf]

And then proceeded to follow it up with 9 whiffs before one hit again?

[Bubbasmama]

Crackin' me up here, hsf!!!

 

 

Thanks!! Needed a good laugh!

[hsf]

I wish I was cracking up. I'm getting genuinely upset that I can't get over 1000 more often! (Between impatience and competitiveness, I've got to have an ulcer the size of Albuquerque!)

[hsf]

But, hey, if my insanity is good for a laugh, then have at it.

 

 

[hsf]

YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! (I'm tired now.)

 

1085.3

 

dum, dum, dum, dum, dum, dum, dum, dum, dum, dum, dum, dum, dum, dum, dum, dum, dum, dum, dum (it's the Olympic theme! seriously, think about it. tell me you're not humming it after reading that!)

[hsf]

MJ, how does one stumble across that game, anyway?

[Bubbasmama]

Sick and twisted friends who send me sick and twisted email!!

 

 

Still haven't figured THAT one out yet!!

[hsf]

LOL!

[hsf]

BTW, look at the Yeti's face sometimes. Before I saw the rock, I could have sworn it was a seal. (The irony of a seal using a club on a penguin alone would have been worth some style points.)

[Rick]

In case you haven't played the original penguin game yet, here's the link.

 

www.meph.eu.org/

[hsf]

Oh no. As if being addicted to one penguin game isn't enough, there are actually two? AAAUUUGGHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Bubbasmama]

In case you haven't played the original penguin game yet, here's the link.

 

www.meph.eu.org/

OK........I like your penguin game better, Rick ...........no blood!!

 

Still not really down with the whole idea of whacking penguins....but this one is better!! (lol...hsf...still laughing at your euphemisms)

[hsf]

Still not really down with the whole idea of whacking penguins....but this one is better!! (lol...hsf...still laughing at your euphemisms)

Hey, my mind naturally goes to "euphemistical" places all the time. (I read whatever I can into the most harmless things.) I was going to continue, but I don't think that this is the place to do that, anyway. Maybe I should open a new thread! Nah, better leave well enough alone.

 

[Bubbasmama]

Subject: Easy To Understand

 

Two bored casino dealers were waiting at a craps table.

 

 

 

A very attractive blonde woman arrived and bet twenty thousand dollars on a single roll of the dice.

 

She said, "I hope you don't mind, but I feel much luckier when I'm completely nude."

 

With that she stripped from her neck down, rolled the dice and yelled "Mama needs new clothes!"

 

Then she hollered..."YES! YES! I WON! I WON!" She jumped up and down and hugged each of the dealers.

 

She then picked up all the money and her clothes and quickly departed. The dealers just stared at each other dumbfounded.

 

 

Finally, one of them asked "What did she roll?"

 

The other answered, "I don't know, I thought YOU were watching!"

 

 

 

Moral of the story:

 

Not all blondes are dumb, but all men....are men.

[Bubbasmama]

Got this in an email....it's too cute!!!

 

 

[hsf]

Got my new penguin high (1092.4), but now I can't crack 1100! What gives?

[hsf]

OK, forget it. I'm done posting about the penguins. I just launched one 1221.4 and I'm finally satisfied. I'm going to give it up the penguin whacking for a while now. (As least as long as one can give up penguin whacking!)

[Bubbasmama]

GEEESH.......my friend must think I hate men.....

 

 

 

WOMAN'S PERFECT BREAKFAST

She's sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee.

Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box.

Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week.

Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl.

And her husband is on the back of the milk carton.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

WOMAN'S REVENGE

"Cash, check or charge?" I asked, after folding items the woman wished to

purchase. As she fumbled for her wallet I noticed a remote control for a

television set in her purse.

 

"So, do you always carry your TV remote?" I asked.

 

"No," she replied, "but my husband refused to come shopping with me, so I figured this was the most legal evil thing I could do to him."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

UNDERSTANDING WOMEN (A MAN'S PERSPECTIVE)

I know I'm not going to understand women. I'll never understand how you can

take boiling hot wax, pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the

root, and still be afraid of a spider.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

MARRIAGE SEMINAR

While attending a Marriage Seminar dealing with communication, Tom and his

wife Grace listened to the instructor, "It is essential that husbands and

wives know the things that are important to each other."

 

He addressed the man, "Can you describe your wife's favorite flower?"

 

Tom leaned over, touched his wife's arm gently and whispered, "It's

Pillsbury, isn't it?"

 

The rest of the story gets rather ugly so I'll stop right here.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

HUSBAND V. WIFE

A couple drove down a country road for several miles,

not saying a word. An earlier discussion had led to an

argument and neither of them wanted to concede their

position. As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats,

and pigs, the husband asked sarcastically, "Relatives

of yours?"

 

"Yep," the wife replied, "in-laws."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

A husband read an article to his wife about how many

words women use a day... 30,000 to a man's 15,000.

The wife replied, "The reason has to be because we

have to repeat everything to men..."

 

The husband then turned to his wife and asked, "What?"

[hsf]

I passed the Penguin Whacking game on to my secretary and she loved it! Thanks MJ!

[T-BONE]

OK you turds...Now that you've had your morning coffee...here's something to get your day going.

 

Colour Test

 

I'm not responsible for your bad day after this

[Bubbasmama]

DAMN you T-BONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 0%

 

 

I blew it big time!!!

[T-BONE]

THWEEEEEEEEET!!!!

 

Here's a good learning experience for all you guys out there!!!!!

 

ABC's

[Bubbasmama]

OK you turds...Now that you've had your morning coffee...here's something to get your day going.

 

Colour Test

 

I'm not responsible for your bad day after this

OK..........88% this time..........dangit!!!

[jaybird]

first try on the colour test 38%

fourth try 100%

 

I will be singing the alphabet song all day now

Thank you